The Deed is Done
The deed has been done. There should be no more turning back. No more. Except, someone is calling my name now, I have to answer, one last time.
In other words, yes, I finally drew in that deep, deep breath, and blurted out everything in a rush.
‘IthinkImgoin2resignatdendofdmonth,Iveaccepteddofferforanequityresearchposition
He was calm, bewildered and bemused, but calm. ‘Do you have a minute to talk about this?’
A minute turned into two, three, half an hour, dragged to a full hour. After that first seconds of breathlessness however, the heavy pounding of my heart slowed to a steadier beat. My words still came out in a tumble, but at least I was more coherent, a tad more collected. Weirdly enough, I had a strong sense of deja vu, like I’d been down this road before. Well, in a way, I have, that one afternoon on a sweltering July not too long before. It’s never easy, nor fun, this business, of breaking of something that’s supposed to be valued, treasured.
My boss was nice, though, and understanding. We engaged in that time honored ritual, dancing lightly about one another, sidestepping the more sensitive issues, and touching on others… I did waver, just a teensy bit. I am, afterall, about to give up my life, and sink myself into the corporate hell hole. His arguments were pretty persuasive. But then, the deed has been done, the fateful words uttered. There can be no turning back. Except of course, that my other boss also wants to talk to me, to persuade me. So we break into another dance.
Aye. Want to leave all these behind for right now, along with that incomprehensible pile of documents I have to wade through and sign. Going to a jazz concert instead. Cheers.